Category Archives: Only in Dubai

By accident or rather evolution and genetic diversification, self awareness happened to be tried out. What perfected it was a layer of several interconnected neural networks linked with a couple of sensors and interesting algorithms.

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Consultants can _do_ everything with powerpoint *slides*. Most of those​ douchebag monkeyass newbies in life and the universe could also prepare another set of freaking powerpoint slides for me on the topic: how can human kind achieve the much needed same respect for every form of life, i.e. women, men, transgenders, animals, artificial intelligence, aliens, the environment (not only the planet Earth but yeah right the whole effing universe and all the parallel universes). (1)

#writing #thoughts #businesspunkmag-germany-mighthavelikeditbutiguesstheyrenotonello(yet?)

(1) btw this respect includes equal pay for all genders but explicitly excludes gender neutral writing in German (Schüler*innen)

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Epic battle
In the end it all boils down to the same two fucking questions​: who got bigger balls and whose dick is longer.
In other, more consultant-and-gender-neutral words: we need to understand our market position and compare our lever with the one of our negotiation partner.

Good or bad. Your choice.
In serendipity we trust.

Ski Dubai flyer, ice cube bbq and car-in-a-box

Thanks to two amazing visitors I came across this epic piece of marketing material. It’s from Ski Dubai. Yeah, the world famous place where you can do skiing in the desert. And apparently you can also meet some penguins.

“It only consumes as little energy as an average sized hotel.”

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Just for the records: of course my visitors did NOT go there 🙂

Talking about winter things in Dubai. Ice cubes. On a bbq. Did not really make sense to me but I was sure there must be a good reason why you do this.

“You know, grill is very hot. And flames would come up – so we put ice cubes”. Well, WTF??

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Dubai is the place for luxury cars (which – sometimes – catch fire). And it’s a little sandy, dusty etc. So what would you do when you have to park your Maybach, Rolls Royce or what-have-you in a basement parking for a while? Exactly – it’s easy: put your car into a plastic tent, air-tight with high pressure so that really nothing can come in. Omg.

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Only in Dubai

So I invited some friends and went shopping for food. Took a cart because it was a little more than usual. I asked the packer guy whether I can take the cart.
‘No’.
‘Do you do delivery?’
‘Walking or car?’
‘Walking.’
‘Sure.’
‘How much is it?’
‘Nothing, I will come with you, no problem.’

It felt so wrong walking next to the guy pushing the cart. To my building. Into my building. Into the elevator. WTF?! Almost invited him to the party.

Aaah and for everyone asking ‘why can’t we have the same in our country?!’. Well it’s because of non-wage labour costs. This poor fellow earns probably nothing. Or a little more.